This week, high school students in my area are celebrating their graduation from high school, with ceremonies and proms and parties. It reminded me that recently, I finally graduated with my B.A. (an Honours degree in Canadian Studies with a History minor). I also won a prize for the top marks in the Canadian Studies programme, which was a really big, and much appreciated, surprise. Here are some personal reflections on both Convocation, and studying as a mature student.
Convocation Day is always one of my favourite days on campus. It is the culmination of students’ hard work, learning, extra activities, and living in community of the previous 4 or 5 (or more) years. It is a day of joy, excitement, and pride on one hand, and nostalgia and the realization that this time as a community, this life in a bubble that is created on a small campus, is now irrevocably ending, and life will never be the same. It is a day when those of us who work on campus say “farewell” to students we have come to know, and watch them spread their wings and leave the nest of university life.
This year, on my Convocation Day, was no exception, but I got to experience the excitement of the graduands as part of the graduating class. It was heartwarming to watch students greet each other, sometimes with hugs, with smiles and laughter, and to be a part of their excitement as we were getting ready for the ceremony. However, also this year, the overall excitement was tempered by a protest organized and led by a group of faculty against the awarding of an honorary degree to a former Ambassador to Israel and Afghanistan. The protest took place as students were entering Convocation Hall and also apparently involved a faculty boycott of the Convocation ceremony. Some students inside also silently protested while she addressed Convocation. I admit that having just completed a stupendous amount of research, I did not independently research the alleged issues, and if I have learned one thing over my lifetime as a student, it is to always do your own research; therefore, I have no personal opinion as to whether she should have been awarded the honorary degree or not. I respect the right of people to protest anything they want, and it was a relatively peaceful and mostly respectful protest. However, my observations of convocations from the many ceremonies I’ve attended over the years is that it has increasingly become less about the real and often significant accomplishments of the graduating students, and more about the honours bestowed on people who have already accumulated a lot of honours… and more importantly for the university, have also accumulated a lot of wealth and connections along the way. This year was no exception. It was disappointing that there were less than a dozen faculty at my Convocation, and I felt for the young students who were graduating who did not have the opportunity to be celebrated by their professors. The focus was not on the graduating students, but on faculty issues and ONE honorary degree recipient. I’m not sure what was accomplished, other than giving her an even wider and more public platform, and taking the focus away from graduates even more than usual.
At first, I wasn't that excited about Convocation. I've been a student for a very long time, and really, it doesn't seem like such a big achievement to get your first degree after such a long time. Everyone else seemed really excited for me, though, and I was overwhelmed by all the messages and support from my colleagues, my family, and my friends, and their excitement and pride on my behalf. Both of my children, AND their partners, insisted on attending, and sat through the long ceremony. One of my two best friends travelled out to share in the weekend, and receiving congratulations from others made me more excited about it. In photos that were taken as I was receiving my degree, I look really happy and excited, and in the end, I was.
And on reflection, I think I should be proud of myself. I started my degree before I got married, then
took time off to work so my husband could study, and had some awesome
jobs along the way. Then I had children,
and chose to stay home with them. I
worked casual and contract jobs here and there, I volunteered with a LOT of
organizations in my community, and every now and then I took one or two courses
at the university. A few years ago, I
decided I needed to finally finish my degree, but then my 2-week temporary job
to replace someone on sick leave turned into a full-time job. So for the past 6 years, I've been working
full-time, as well as studying. And of
course, like everyone else, I also had to deal with COVID. This last year, in particular, was difficult. My mom died last year, and even though it was
not totally unexpected, it has been difficult.
Although I had a great deal of support from most of my work colleagues, I
was the victim of workplace harassment by one person. I had to do a reading course at the same time
as my thesis, which involved reading at least 30 different works and producing
an annotated bibliography. And because
of the intensity of the reading course, I basically ended up writing my thesis
in one semester instead of two; the vast majority of my research was already
done, but I still had to read in areas that were not covered in my
reading course, which was mostly irrelevant to my thesis. I am exceedingly proud of my thesis and the
work I did writing and researching it, despite the fact that it was the lowest
mark I received at this university other than my mark in Postmodern Canadian
Lit (don't worry, it's still a very good mark!), and I am extremely satisfied
that I have produced the most complete and accurate and in-depth biography of
John Hammond that exists. But of course, research never ends, and there are still lots of things to discover about Hammond.
As for graduating as a (very!) mature student, I am proud of persevering, even though at this point in my life, a Bachelor’s degree is not going to make a big difference to me. While the other graduates are just starting their career paths and lives, I am at the other end. When I started studying at this university many years ago, there was a mature student advisor, and at some points throughout the years, there were mature student groups. Now, there is no support, no formal acknowledgement of the added pressures of the juggling that sometimes needs to take place, the time management, and the other commitments that many mature students have to cope with. As far as I know, there is only one award given at Convocation specifically for mature students, and the last time I checked, it was administered under the Meighen Centre, whose mission statement says that it “provides accessibility support to students with disabilities and medical conditions.” Hmmm………………….
Earlier in my studies, I was included in departmental field trips and e-mails and opportunities for students within my programme of study, but as time went on, these notifications and e-mails seemed to end, and I felt excluded from these opportunities. At times, I felt quite alone, and also sometimes felt that I was held to higher standards than the typical 18-24 year old students who were studying alongside me. Maybe that’s a fair expectation, given that I have more life experience than the younger students. I haven’t quite decided.
While I felt a general lack of institutional support at times, I am extremely grateful for the support I received from many individuals within the institution, including other researchers, individual professors, many of the people I work with, archivists and librarians, and my friends. I was thrilled and overwhelmed with how many staff and faculty members were excited for me as Convocation approached. My parents are no longer here, but they too always encouraged me to finish my degree, and I know they would have been proud and excited to see me cross the stage.
In the end, despite things that frustrated me, I know that I am extremely fortunate to have been able to study at a well-respected institution. I took some stimulating and thought-provoking courses and produced some fun and interesting assignments. I’m fortunate that my professors allowed me to focus on issues that were important to me. It is not lost on me that a lot of women in my shoes are never able to complete their studies, and of course, in many parts of the world, girls and women are not permitted even the most basic of education, let alone university degrees. I am grateful for all of the opportunities that have been provided for me to finish my formal education.
I have met many alumni from my university, and I always envied them for being “part of the club.” Now I’m part of it, too, and I’m proud to be associated with them. It feels strange to not be thinking about what courses to take next year, but I am more than ready to move on.
